Author: Michiru Adrienne

In Loving Memory

.Reading time 3 minutes.

Himiko~chan🖤🐾
(June 20, 2004 ~ March 28, 2023)

In the summer of 2004, it must have been sometime in July, I went to the local farmers market and happened upon a man who had a cardboard box with two little kittens inside. One was the cutest girl-kitty, black and white with green eyes, and the other was the cutest boy-kitty, all grey with a little white spot on his chest. They were sister and brother, and moments later, my kitties. At home with my new little family, I thought about their names and was wondering, Kimiko? Himiko? What was the name of the ancient priestess-leader in Japan?? Himiko, not Kimiko. Okay. So she became my kitty Himiko.
Fast forward over eighteen and a half years later, and I call a pet cremation company after muttering to myself a million times, “You can do this, you can do this.” A man answers the phone and after a brief inquiry about pricing, procedure, etc. he asks me for my cat’s name. “Himiko” I reply, starting to cry. And then since it’s a Japanese name and I’m in the US, I start to spell it out for him but he stops me mid-sentence saying, “I know exactly how to spell Himiko—that’s my daughter’s name!” I start to explain that it’s Himiko, not Kimiko, being certain that his daughter would not be named Himiko, but the conversation moved on. The next day when he came to pick up my Himiko, I asked him about his daughter and he clarified that indeed, her name is Kimiko, not Himiko.

Queen Himiko
New Year’s Sunrise
my heart
Her favorite heater.
Chasing Birds
At least one of us is doing yoga!
Best Christmas present ever, fish tacos!
cicada’s demise
my baby
Kyoto circa 2013
Himichan magic.
15th Birthday.
BFF
Our favorite selfie.
Partners in kawaii.
Her favorite pillow.
One of our final days together.
She passed bathed in sunlight.

I share this story not only for its remarkable synchronicity, but also for how it exemplifies Himiko-chan’s magic. Her whole life was like that. She truly lived up to her name in both royalty and spirit. Himichan (her nickname) was friendly, feisty, intelligent, inquisitive, polite, caring and loving. She was my kitty-baby, my best friend, my travel companion, my heart, my kitty-soulmate. She was one tough kitty-cat and my shero—the one I still aspire to be when I grown up. 🖤🐾
“Death ends a life, but it does not end the relationship.”
Himichan will be in my heart forever and with me in spirit always.

catnap

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

Since March 4th, I’ve been focusing on my senior kitty who’s been with me forever (close to 19 years), and is now in need of intensive care. So we are taking a catnap together—from everything. From everything that is, except each other and sitting in the garden sunshine with chirping birds and the breeze.

I only know myself as her human.

Something will transpire, sometime and somehow, and some foreign future self unknown to me now, will resume weekly posts. In the meantime, perhaps I will share some old photos or stories of us… or perhaps just the silence.

Thank you for reading and I will be in touch again. 🐾🖤

forty seven

.Reading time 1 minute.
Photo: spiral galaxy NGC 1232, from European Southern Observatory

somewhere, some
forty seven layers down into the center
of earth
and somewhere, another
forty seven layers into the center
of the universe
we walk

hand in hand we walk
beneath the seabed
and along smoldering crevices
these ancient lungs breathing long rivers of fire
in the darkness

we walk on and on
all along these meandering trails
through tall fields of sunlight and pink wildflowers
we step into streams of cold crystal water
smooth around our ankles and cupped hands

and on top of these snow-covered mountain peaks
we walk
where the soaring blue sky is pierced
with song, and with long silver threads of one thousand swans
who like us, fly home

through layer after layer
on and on and into the jet black ink of night, we walk
holding hands here in this deep space brimming with bejeweled skies
we’re swirling and spiraling and dancing
we spin
we, spin and
we spin
our house of love

poems

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

flowering

.Reading time less than 1 minute.


my Love is more
than even the wildest wild rose
an unrestrained, and
captivating beauty—the rarest
flower
tumbling up into the sky, and freer
than the swiftest starling
but still, this singular flower is
rooted
firmly, deeply, ever inextricably
in this soil
in this rich and moist and black
soil,
rooted ever so deeply inside
this deep deep love
flowering

sounding board

.Reading time 1 minute.

Have you felt that too? Not singing, but being sung by the world? Body as sounding board for the swirling elements of air, water, light, and, soft soil? Like mist, song emerging from the slow steps and soft contours of a dance… each and every cell connected to wind and white feathers in flight?
One day, while practicing fue (a kind of traditional Japanese flute) and singing by the Kamo River in Kyoto, I felt that… that sensation of being saturated by the mist and the light. By wind and by love.

The photograph above was taken then, when I felt that. It’s not a particularly striking nor clear picture, but somehow it captured some airborne shimmering light, sparkles, and an egret… Somehow it captures something like being saturated by the light and the mist… something like being a sounding board for the world.

weather

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

we can weather
any change of sky
when we stay
{you & i}
together
🖤

burn

.Reading time less than 1 minute.


can i burn ?
candleflame—like in the dark
when these wounds are much
too much
and the horizon
has all but disappeared
can i burn , please ?
softly
candelflame—like
in the dark

at the end of the day

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

all i ever want
at the end of the day
is to lose myself entirely
in your arms

Our Goddess of the Night

.Reading time less than 1 minute.

do not forget
the moon
is not a faraway and solitary light
no
she is Goddess of the Night
she is the longing that you hear in the howl
of wolves
and she is the swell of ocean waves
climbing higher and higher
ashore
she is the soul of the moonflower
glowing soft silk and white
and
she is the alchemy of the womb
in our bodies
of desire

into her round glowing body
shadowy and soft
she draws the entire inkblack sky
and births anew
light

Our Goddess of the Night